What does a “homosexual” look like?
“And then there was another family friend — Fred Tillman, our neighbor across the stream at Aptos — but he didn’t ‘look’ like a homosexual; he was big and burly, he lifted weights…. ‘Fred was a pansy — Fred was a queer,’ Daddy interjected.”
Excerpt from Patricia Bosworth’s Anything Your Little Heart Desires (Simon & Schuster, 1997).
The subject of the foregoing dinner conversation on homosexuality was my great uncle Fred Adolphus Tillman (1891-1972), brother of my grandmother Agnes Lilly Tillmann. “Daddy” is Bartley Crum, speaking to his daughter Patricia Bosworth in an excerpt from Bosworth’s memoir Anything Your Little Heart Desires (1997).
Attorney Bartley Crum was famous for defending Hollywood actors testifying before the House Committee on Un-American Activities (late 1940s/early 1950s). From a book jacket: “Bartley Cavanaugh Crum was an adviser to Harry Truman, a key figure in the founding of Israel, and a defender of blacklisted Hollywood writers and artists.” Crum was likely more famous for representing Rita Hayworth in her divorce.
Aptos (mentioned in the conversation) is the location of Mangels Ranch, acquired by Claus Mangels in the 1880s from his brother-in-law Claus Spreckels.
As a Mangels grandchild Fred inherited a portion of Mangels Ranch, including the derelict Aptos Rancho house, which Fred renovated and sold to Patricia’s father Bartley Crum. So Patricia grew up knowing Fred as a neighbor. However, Patricia’s published revelation was no surprise to the family.
So what’s it like to grow up gay and wealthy in San Francisco’s Gilded Age (1890-1920)? Following is a photo spread. But first a word about me and Uncle Fred.
Me & Uncle Fred
Back in the 1960s a visit from Great Uncle Fred was always a treat because he told me fabulous stories about my grandmother Agnes Lilly and The City’s Gilded Age in the 1900s when the Tillmann siblings were both coming of age. And he gave me stamps and stuffed kangaroo toys from his friend Michael in Australia — that was special.
Let’s be clear — I was a youngster and Fred came to visit my mother / his niece in Hillsborough on Fred’s travels either to or from Palm Springs, his home.
I always knew Fred was a lifelong batchelor who hung out with high society folks (as did my grandmother), like members of the Pacific Union or Burlingame Country Clubs. And when Fred left his estate largely to his Australian friend Michael, this was no surprise to me since Fred had no kids and Michael was a longtime friend whom I had met.
My elderly cousin Karl Mertz caught my attention once by saying that Fred was “gay” — it made sense to me, so no surprise, just a term I would not have used because I didn’t know Fred well enough. However, Karl knew Fred and was close to him for half a century, whereas I was just a kid when Fred paid visits. Fred’s gay life in San Francisco was not a topic of conversation while my uncle and I looked at stamps and kangaroo toys.
A Gay Boy in San Francisco‘s Gilded Age
Fred was born in The City (1890), but spent most of the 1890s growing up at the Tillmann’s Fruitvale estate in Oakland. The Oakland residence burned to the ground in 1900, after which the Tillmanns moved back to San Francisco.
Grove Street, San Francisco
Fruitvale Avenue, Oakland
Papa Frederick Tillmann Jr. built a house for his family on a 12-acre estate named “Edendale” along Fruitvale avenue in Oakland near Brookdale. The Tillmanns lived there from about 1892 to 1900.
Mangels Ranch, Aptos
As mentioned earlier, Fred’s grandfather Claus Mangels acquired a 550 acre ranch in Aptos where the family spent summers away from San Francisco. Fred lived there on and off his entire life.
2000 Washington Street, San Francisco
The Tillmann family acquired 2000 Washington street in 1901 and lived there until the 1920s when Fred Tillman tore down the family home and built the community apartments standing today.
Business
Fred’s pioneer grandfather started the family business Tillmann & Bendel, Wholesale Grocers, in 1857. Fred assumed charge of the business from his father in 1915, and he liquidated the firm in the 1930s.
Fred Tillman, Society Man
Fred was a lifelong Society Man, living in Palm Springs later in life and traveling to The City for formal dinners and special occasions, staying at the Pacific Union Club where he was a member.
